Wow a lot of vulnerability in this post but God is doing some REALLY REALLY cool things in my heart + who knows, it might resonate with you too. 

A little insert from my journal: 

“One thing I’m struggling with but have recognized and now working through is intimacy within community. It’s like I’m a open book when I was to be or when it’s on my terms, but if I’m not feeling it then I shut it down + shut people out. I tell myself “this isn’t who you are” but if I honestly look over the past couple of months + years then it’s exactly how I’ve been. There’s a difference between me saying “I love people” and me ACTUALLY loving them. It’s like I let people in to know my struggles and hurts and then hold them at arms length because they now know instead of letting them love me + in return loving them. I know I need to ask God for the love to give (ooooh He already gives it, just give me eyes to see) but I also know I can’t pour from an empty cup. It might be that I need to learn how to be loved to love. But isn’t that who He calls me? BELOVED. That’s who I am. Through that, I can love others” 

Wow. Thanks God. 

And to the one who is reading this- that’s who you are too! His beloved. Praying that you walk in that truth and freedom today. 

McKayla